SKIPPING AND DANCING: Why? The Amazing Race began anew last night. It made the end of my weekend not so sad. In just the first episode we were treated to drama, tears, an improbable challenge, an animal-based task, and tons of personality. I can't really tell you my favorite part because I was just so happy to be watching, period. The cherry on the ice cream was that the couple I hated most is already gone. The Long-Island-stereotypes (I guess they were billed as Ari & Staella and officially labeled "Best Friends") annoyed me from the first minute they got on-screen. Ari's bio, actually, annoyed me. It says...
"Ari is catty and not afraid to speak his mind."Keep in mind, Ari is male. It continues...
"Ari describes himself as mean, rude and hilarious, and enjoys dancing and talking trash to people."Rude = hilarious? OK. I'll go with it. If his name is Don Rickles, yes. It might work. Ari, however, is not Rickles and his pride in his rudeness sickens me. The bio fails to mention Ari's parents couldn't be more disappointed in him. Listen, I like dancing just as much as the next guy, but I really hope when I get onto the Amazing Race someday that my bio doesn't say, "Don likes to dance and make fun of handicap people." In fact, ya know how some motivational speakers encourage you to write your own eulogy? They suggest this exercise in order for you to better motivate yourself and identify that which is important in life. I'll take that one step further. I suggest you write your own reality show bio and try and figure out what 2-4 word bio line would be used by a network to describe you. Like "dating Goths" or "Married Ministers." My wife and I would like to be captioned as "Mortal Enemies/Married"
OK. I'd like that bio-line. I can't speak for my mortal enemy ...er ...lovely wife. At the risk of seeming like a goody-two-shoes, I think anyone who describes himself as enjoying "talking trash" and being "rude" should be gone. I thought I'd hate the dating Goths immediately, but I don't. I hated Ari (aka Rude-Guy) and he got what was coming ...and he's going. I'm happy.
I'm highly intrigued by the Guy-Who-Cheated-On-His-Girlfriend and That-Girlfriend. You just know he's totally on the show to get laid and he's gotta be scopin' the hot blonde team. I'm pretty sure Guy-Who-Cheated-On-His-Girlfriend rolled his eyes in their off-camera interview sequence when he said, "it was the biggest mistake of my life." Was he talking with his homeboy on a cell phone, right then? Playa, y'all. And, I'm slightly annoyed by this team because That-Girlfriend needed to walk during a critical stretch of the race.
Note to self: If you ever get picked for The Amazing Race, do some wind sprints beforehand.
Oh, and I also learned about Ireland and that people in that country travel by high-wire-bike counter balanced by another human. I'm cultured. I, now, never have to visit Ireland as I know that I'm afraid of heights and I would not be able to travel there.
Next week on The Amazing Race we get to laugh at an old man wallowing in the mud.
FOOTBALLING: I thought the Spartan's collapse to the Wolverines might've ruined my sport-related weekend - but the Lions changed all that by winning and pushing their record to 6-and-2. This is for real. 6-and-2 teams make the playoffs. 6-and-2 teams deserve to be cheered for and served up with glowing praise on sports talk stations all day and night in their home town.
LISTENING: Sports talk radio. All day. AM 1130 WDFN from 8am until 2pm at which time I'll flip over to AM 1270, WXYT and tune into Mike Valenti. As soon as he moves off Lions topic, I"ll be back to AM 1130 WDFN and Stoney & Wojo. I'll flip back and forth and listen to whomever is talking Lions.
STRIKING AND SCABBING: I joined the Writer's Guild on Friday. So I guess I'm a scab by even writing this blog entry today. Oh, wait ...we're striking at 9am. Done. Period.
This week is off to a great start. I'm on strike.