Heroes

HEROES: What the hell is going on? I am but a modest blog author and I need gaping story line flaws at which to poke fun. Can I really make a whole blog entry about how the Young-George-Takai actor was so unconvincing it took me until this morning to convince myself that's who that Asian guy from the flashback was supposed to be? Can I raise my fist in anger because last week's preview clearly showed Hiro holding a sword against Peter Patrelli's neck (look at all these names I'm learning), but this week that scene didn't happen? Instead we see a charging Hiro with that symbol on his sword.

I guess I can laugh about Quick-Learn-Chick deciding that wedging herself in the ceiling joists was the best way to hide? Yes. I'll laugh at that. Cuz that was ridiculous. Ever heard of a closet? Or did you think of going back out the window and running your ass off? Are these street punks really involved in a comic book syndicate? I guess her double-dutching and pole-spin-kick weren't the best things for her to have learned 5 episodes, ago. This story line and the 7-8 minutes of valuable time it took from the primary plot really annoyed me. It might not annoy me on a typical Monday, but with the writer's strike and all, I want all killer, no filler.

It will be dark days ahead for us TV junkies. I get a pit in my stomach thinking that, without new episodes of all my TV shows, we might get a return of the Donnie & Marie Show - but without jokes. Don't get me wrong, I love a variety show but I don't want to see these old people trying to recreate that magic. I'm tellin' ya ...this could happen. And, ah, hell ...I'd watch and sing-a-long.

I have no shame.

Heroes. Sorry. Apparently my other hero power is the ability to tangent (this adds to my power of common sense). Imagine how I could use that power. Me, tied up in a chair while being interrogated as to the location of a certain virus and I start into telling them but then, before long, I'm telling them about my salsa recipe and my Christmas lights and they're like, "JUST TELL ME WHERE THE VIRUS IS BEING KEPT." And I'm like, "I was getting to that, sorry. I just sometimes get distracted and there I was telling you about my salsa recipe and all you wanted to know was the virus's location and, well, next thing you know I'll be telling you about my vacations in Gulf Shores because that's very near where I'm keeping the virus. Have I told you about Gulf Shores? You really must go if you've never gone, it'll be the best vacation you've ever taken ..."

People would be hypnotized by my long, pointless stories and, hopefully, a kick-ass hero might be able to save me in the meantime or my protagonists would just throw up their hands and give up.

Oh, wait. I'm a member of the Writer's Guild and I can't be writing gold like that whilst on-strike.

I struggle with whom to believe. And also when to use "whom" v. "who." One minute, Ned Ryerson seems totally crooked. Then he lets Mohinder go save his friend. He wants his daughter to "watch" the Cheerleader, but why wouldn't he just kidnap her and put her in the facility? Does he want her to turn herself in willingly? One minute Adam Monroe (aka Kensai) seems on the up-n-up, then the 1970s Kensai looks to be the guy who wants to release the virus.

It's the old game of he-said-she-said, but unlike many times when it refers to a couple breaking up, in this case it refers to Armageddon.

I'm just not going to get my questions answered. I'll read Nickel-Guy's thoughts. I'll talk to my brother. My wife is back 0n-board with Heroes and she's much smarter than I, so maybe she can help me.

1. How will Sylar get his powers back? 2. Why doesn't anyone know where Sylar is? 3. Is it possible Sylar could fall for ol' Death Eyes? 4. Who's more badass? Sylar or Peter? I like Sylar cuz he has goals ...rule the world. Versus Peter, who wants to save the world, but is dumber than a box of rocks. 5. How is Hiro going to screw things up this time? 6. Is Adam going to release the virus? 7. Is Adam a good guy or bad buy? 8. Is Ned Ryerson going to release the virus? 9. Is Sylar going to release the virus? 10. How did Sylar get into the Seeker-Girl's bedroom and where in the hell is Mind-Reader-Guy? 10. Why is Peter just following Adam around willy nelly and not, say, reaching out to his brother or mother for, say, an opinion or some advice? I like to think when tough questions are being asked, you can still count on dear old Mom for some help. 11. What is the point of killing the newest member of "the twelve" in the same show you meet her? What were her powers? Oh, right ...we'll find out because no one ever dies on this show. 12. Why did they keep Bennet alive? 13. Who kept Bennet alive? 14. Where is he being held? 15. Finally, what is the point of the Quick-Learn girl and when is this boy going to matter to the overall theme?

Phew. I have to stop. I'm getting a head ache from my anxiousness. I can't wait until next Monday for the "finale." Just know I'll be crying a little at 10:01pm knowing that it might be months and months until any of my questions are answered.