Thursday, August 30, 2007

All Things Cheese and Some Beef

I'm really not a TV or entertainment blog ...how can I compete with blogs devoted solely to pop culture, TV shows, movies, and music. I dabble in all of them, but I aim to be a clever blog. But, alas, apparently I'm somewhat a TV-slash-movie-slash-pop-culture addict. A The Soup wannabe, if you will. On with the show....

I got a haircut last Friday. It's a great haircut. I could walk on the set of Ocean's 14 and someone would puff my face with one of those face-powder-puff things ...because they'd think I'm an actor cuz of my awesome hair ...get it? Aren't the best jokes those jokes you have to explain? I agree.

I've decided to post to Donniego on Sundays and Wednesdays - or very close to those days and unless something truly inspires me ...like this ...can a 40-year-old musician still be called a "punk rocker?" Case in point, Bad Religion's Greg Hetson was recently introduced on a radio show as a "punk rocker." Aren't you "punk" or "a punk" when you are young and bucking the system? Showing no initiative? Trying not to fit in? If you are young and doing those things you might, hence, be labeled a "punk." But if you are 40 years old, you are married, have kids, and are playing in a band because you love music and you need to feed yer kids and pay for their college ...well ...explain to me how that is "punk." Similarly, if you are 40 years old, you're wearing a blonded-out-mohawk, you refuse to work or give up your marijuana, well ...aren't you just called a "loser?" I kinda hope being an upstanding citizen can be called "punk" cuz that means I'm TOTALLY PUNK, DUDE!!! Other titles you can't hang onto ...teen idol, teen heartthrob, child actor, and child prodigy.

THE CHEESIEST DAD: Matt Lauer. He says, "I'm right up there with the cheesiest of dads." Having dinner with your family is cheesy? Um ...actually ...IT'S F'N PUNK, DUDE!!!

HOORAY!: It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia's new season debuts on FX Sept. 13. There are so many noteworthy TV debuts and dates coming up, I think I'll make a list on the right side to remind me (and you). Another story on this from my wife is here.

PUNCHLINE NEEDED: After all the rehab and jail time, Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan, and Paris Hilton decide they need a vacation away and decide they need a weekend of skiing in Colorado. Why? Because Lindsay Lohan loves piles of white powder, Paris Hilton really likes pole, and Britney Spears . . . .?

PUNCHLINE NEEDED #2: What do you call a Catholic Priest who is also a Cub Scout leader?

The punchlines to both of those jokes will be GOLD!!! I just can't think of them.

SAW IT: Superbad. There's probably a thousand reviews out there, so I'll sum it up this way ...it's the hardest I've laughed in a theatre outside of South Park: Bigger, Longer, Uncut, and There's Something About Mary. Oh, and Dumb and Dumber. You'd think that teen comedies and all the jokes were used up, by now. Apparently not. This was like American Pie, but even funnier. Two hours of gags and jokes. I had an upset stomach at the end because of the belly laughter. I came away from the movie with these nuggets: (1) Michael Cera, Seth Rogan, and Clark Duke are squarely in my radar. And "in my radar" means that I will probably become obsessed with them. Case in point, my nugget #2 ...(2) I'm destined to write something clever that Seth Rogan will notice and before long I'll be hanging out and partying with Cera, Duke, and Seth ...cuz I assume they hang all the time. What will I write? A joke about getting laid or something, but it'll be written in a supressed, confused, midwest guy sorta way. I'll be a supporting cast member in the third season of Greek. Mark my words. Also, just know that 9 years ago I was completely focused on collaborating with Bob Odenkirk and David Cross - I'll bet you don't remember what we did together, right? Right.

Have you bookmarked the All Pilot Project? Do it. Cuz I'll be contributing ...I think.

Blogging is for crazy people ...therefore, I blog.

2 comments:

DarrinW said...

After all the rehab and jail time, Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan, and Paris Hilton decide they need a vacation away and decide they need a weekend of skiing in Colorado. Why? Because Lindsay Lohan loves piles of white powder, Paris Hilton really likes pole, and Britney Spears . . . .?

- Britney Spears is going to do the milk run! Get it? The Milk Run.... first run of the day on the slopes is called a milk run. Britney has cow udders for breasts these days. Funny?? Okay, not so much but that would KILL in Steamboat Springs.

- Britney is going simply because her career is caught up in an avalanche and she heard there are rescue teams that can pull her out...... This might have some potential?!?!?

- Britney is going because she confused ski patrol with beaver patrol!

What do you call a Priest that is also a Cub Scout Leader?

- Michael Jackson's best friend

- the "bishop".... okay, that just sounds funny to me but doesn't actually mean anything.

- a "semenarian".... get it?? a play on seminarian....

- keeping it in the family.

- Lucky

That's all I got.

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