I Love Batman Week

What's that? "I Love Batman Week?" I know. Not nearly as much fun as "I Love Don Week" and thanks to everyone who made it such a great week. Wow. Talk about awesomeness. But, no. This week is Batweek or "Batman Week" on spunkybean.com. Everyday we'll have another ...oh ...wait ...

CRUSADING: Caped. As in "Caped Crusader" which is, of course, Batman. At least I hope it is, or EJ and Nic will spray me with sleeping or laughing gas, no doubt. All this week on spunkybean we're gonna have articles about Batman, Batman's enemies, the good Batman stuff, the bad, and even the hunkiest Batmen. If you like Batman even a little (or have a pre-teen nephew or a cousin who never married and wears a Batman watch), make sure you read. You'll love it.

CHOKING: Down Old Fashioneds. Here's a suggestion ...don't ask the 19-year-old at your neighborhood grocery store, the kid stocking the shelves with bagged cheeses, where Angostura bitters are. They'll look at you like you're crazy. Second tip ...if you can avoid it, don't take your 5 and 4-year-old into a corner liquor store. It's been a while and there is an incredible amount of porn ...everywhere ...at a liquor store. If the sign out front says "Beer. Wine. Liquor. Lottery.", you can bet there's porn ...everywhere. And ...also in the store? Drunks with red faces buying more booze. However, I've never met more friendly and helpful people than the two gentlemen running the place. It was like I brought a box full of kittens and Santa Claus into their establishment. They gave each kid a candy bar, gave them each a quarter, and recognizing that I had cornered my children in a section who's site lines were free of porn mag covers, the owners ran all over their liquor store grabbing me "bitters", Rye Whisky, and every other type of whiskey they had. Then they pulled out a drink-making book and consulted 4 or 5 possible Old Fashioned recipes and explained the differences I'd notice between the whiskeys. It was really cool, actually ...except for the fact I had a 5 and 4-year-old with me. Whoops.

In the end, I got my bitters and the owners both agreed (Vikas and Alan) that the Seagrams 7 I had at home would work well enough. My 5-year-old wanted, "Aladdin's lamp" ...the liquor who's packaging looks like a genies lamp. I could make a crude joke here about buying that for Mommy and having a "wish granted" but ...please ...my Aunt and Uncles read this. I'm classier than that.

Once home, I put two sugar cubes in a rocks glass, douced them in bitters, smashed the cubes, filled the glass with ice, added 2 oz of Seagrams 7, added an orange slice and ...choked ...down ...essentially ...whisky with just a hint of sweetness. I'll bet it would have tasted better with a cigarette in my hand and Brylcreem in my hair. Well, my 2nd attempt, I used 2 sugar cubes and smashed (muddled) an entire orange slice before adding the ice and whiskey. And ya know what? It still tasted like whiskey.

So ...my next Old Fashioned is going to be prepared using brandy or Southern Comfort (which I love ...I love a SoCo Manhattan) and I'll report back.

RUNNING: Club. Yup. That's right. I'm going to join a running club. I'm fit.