More Security Guard

My brother worked an all night shift and got two new little nuggets of Security Guard brilliance. I almost want to apply for a job there just to experience this, first hand. Also new this time was the inclusion of the person working the Customer Service desk.

The DonniEgo Community Theatre Players
present
The Crazy Conversation III & IV:
G= The Security Guard; B = My Brother;
D = Customer Service Desk Worker

G: Hey. This sign says 'Tosti Gold' and we don't have any on this display (guard hands sign to my brother).

B: Oh.

G: I know that one of the night crew guys hit this display about 10:30 or 10:45. That might have been the Tosti that he damaged. I think there were about 8 or 9 bottles.

D: Okay. Maybe.

G: Yeah... you seem to be selling this wine a little bit.

(later that evening)

G: (guard enters my brother's office) I'm gonna need these tonight (guard holds up a pair of gloves he just purchased). It is gonna get cold.

B: Oh.

G: Yep. They are a perfect fit. I like these. I don't like leather. I had leather once. I like cloth. Very durable, and washable. Yeh. These will work.

On his way out of the office the guard caught the ear of one of the girls at the service desk...

G: This song is okay (commenting on the Musak system).

D: What?

G: You know music was an early form of communication?

D: What?

G: Early communication was through song. Give me some HARD ROCK!!! That's how I like to communicate is with HARD ROCK!!!!!